On your third birthday

Happy birthday baby girl. My sweet, feisty, strong, brave, tiny little bug. I can't believe you are three.

You are the baby I didn't know I needed until I had you, and now I can't imagine our family without you. And I do need you, baby girl. I need you and love you so much.  Some days it scares me, because I don't want to hurt you or damage you, and parenting a girl scares the ever living shit out of me. Girls are hard, and scary, and fearsome - I know, I am one... but you are so easy to love, and it all comes back to that.

I promise to always love you, my little one. Even when loving you means making you hate me. I want to wrap you up in bubble wrap and protect you from the world, but I can't and should not and won't. I will let you get hurt and make mistakes, and will hold you and rock you. I would take on any hurt you get if I could, be it a scraped knee or a broken heart. Hurting is part of it all, and it sucks, and it kills me to see your tears. May I always be able to kiss them away, may a "Hello Kitty" band-aid always make it better.

You are growing up so fast. I'll let you grow up, I promise. But you will always be my little buggy and I will always love you baby girl. Happy birthday, Clara. I can't wait to see what 3 brings to you.

Rewards

The kids are getting a little addicted to playing with my iPad and Tom's Samsung 10 tablet. And they think our laptops and desk tops are theirs. I try to work, they want to play Star Fall. Tom wants to read the news, they want Angry Birds. Add in some general bratty behavior (Clara flat out ignoring us, George saying "NO!" to every. damn. thing.) and we were done up.

So after chatting with their day care provider, talking to some mom friends, and Googling "bratty toddler behavior" (after having a couple glasses of wine - and I seriously suggest you do not Google that sober), I've come up with a strategy to attack this head on. And yes, I fully expect it to kick me in the ass later, but for now, let's go with it.

The kids now have to earn computer time. Yes, the 4.5-year-old and days-from-turning-3-year-old must now work for screen time. Good behavior, using manners, not throwing a shit fit when it is time for the evening clean-up, going to bed without a fight - all these things will earn tokens that can be traded for 10 minutes of computer time. I was going for 5 minutes, Tom thought 10 was more fair.

So while I do not believe in rewarding for being a member of the family and a good citizen, because that is just what is expected of a member of society, I do think that maybe the kids could use some kind of positive reinforcement... and I am tired of reading BOB books on my iPad when I really want to play Bubble Pop or browse Pinterest.

And I can already see their personalities coining out to the extreme in this - Clara is hoarding her tokens, George earns one and right away asks for the iPad and timer.

Song stuck in my head

This song has been playing in my head, off and on all day today. At least I think it was only in my head... although I know I was singing it for a bit, because I caught Clara humming it once or twice.

Jeff Buckley - Hallelujah


http://youtu.be/y8AWFf7EAc4